Grocer Man
Well-Known Member
Basically, this was a short story I wrote when I moved into a new house. The backyard was infested with moles, which were driven out in about 2 days by my dogs.
The basic idea is that it's the same story, but from the moles perspective.
Then I got the idea of my dogs facing an army of angry moles ala LOTR, and the whole thing pretty much turned into this.
~
Fall of the Mole Empire
Narrated by Sniffles the mole
THE STORY YOU ARE ABOUT TO READ IS TRUE.
THE TRUTH HAS BEEN ALTERED TO MAKE THE STORY SOUND COOLER.
Deeproot
Root XVII
As I write in my study, I can barely left my quill, as I am exhausted from the festival. Today, our great and glorious emporer, William the Snookinukums XXX, celebrated his 23rd year of rule over us. He promptly celebrated by opening a new series of mines, to be excavated tomarrow. Afterwards followed a great deal of frivolity, consumption of dainty foods, and much heavy drinking.
On a less important note, there have been reports of severe structural damage to the mines, many of which have collapsed. Advance scouts claim that the damage was caused by gigantic beasts. However, His Majesty assured us that nothing was wrong, and the mines would be excavated on schedule. The advance workers were sent to an insane asylem.
Deeproot
Root XVIII
(The following description is based on interviews of witnesses to the following events, as the Chronicler was not present at the time, allegedly due to a cold.)
Early in the morning, the grand Imperial city of Molymolyopolis was suddenly attacked, as a gigantic, ferocious beast dug through the surface! It was covered in blackest fur, with a white stripe running from his neck to his mouth, which contained horrible, gnashing jaws! The beast mercilessly devoured all within sight, crushed by his awesome jaws! Some unfortunate souls were thrown onto the surface, to be slowly killed by the unyielding brightness of the Bright Circle! The Royal Guard were swiftly dispatched, but had no chance against the monster!
Shortly afterward, the mines were again attacked by a similar monster, this one white with black veils over his eyes. Thousands of moles were killed in the sudden onsauloght! None could escape! The Jackal knew no mercy!
This sudden double attack has shaken the entire Empire. Against the solemn sagacity of his advisors to evacuate, and completely ignoring diplomacy, His Majesty authorized total war against the creatures. Within hours, the entire Mole army was poised for combat, armed to the teeth with every weapon known to molekind, with only odious spite for the creatures. To deal with the rays of the Bright Circle, our scientists swiftly set an UV Ray Shield on the planned battlefield.
Deeproot
Root XIX
As I write this, I am sitting beside his majesty, to document the battle from the stands. The monsters, (which I have dubbed Crescent and Jackal, respecitively) seemed perplexed by the presence of our army, cocking their hideously fuzzy heads. A messenger was sent to the monsters to negotiate. The negotiations were as follows:
"Hear me, giant beasts! In your atrocious attacks against molekind, you have brought the full wrath of William the Snookiwookums XXX and the entirety of the mole empire upon you! But let it not be said that we are not merciful! If you choose to surrender, you shall simply be painlessly killed and turned into pelts to adorn His Majesty's throne room! Do not comply, and you shall be completely and totally annihilated!"
The beasts took a few moments of deliberation before eating the messenger. With a cry of "Imperious Rex!" the army charged into battle, ignorant of the peril! Infantry were scattered like duckpins by their ferocious barks! Artillery found their artillery lasers unable to even remotely sear the beasts adamantine fur! Not even the Air Force could stop them!
One of our more cogitating soldiers, suggested that we hollow the ground beneath them, causing the ground to collapse, which, in turn, causes the monsters to plummet into a bottomless pit from which there is no return!
However, this proved to be a futile gesture, as the hallowed out ground only sank half an inch. All the diggers were eaten.
After 50% of the army was destroyed, a rather vexed Majesty announced he would personally and furtively (the utterance of which swiftly became redundant) go to activate the top-secret weapon, Project Golem. The Royal Guard escorted him to the weapon, located in Lily Canyon.
Ten minutes after their departure, at the zenith of the conflict, a gigantic collososs made entirely of soil made its way onto the battlefield. Nearly 8 inches high, it was equal in height to the mighty Jackal! I was informed by a member of the Royal Guard that this was the top-secret weapon called the Golem, piloted by none other then His Majesty! He then proceeded to make a speech:
"Foolish beasts! You think you stand a chance against my divine right to rule? Bah! You will never understand the power I am entitled to! All exists to bow before me! The moles, you surface dwellers, even the Bright Circle! I am-"
The one called Jackal then smote the Golem, tapping it with it's paw. The Golem promptly crumbled. His Majesty was crushed underneath the dirt.
What followed was mass hysteria as the soldiers and citizens dug for their lives as far as their claws could take them. Within three hours the once glorious city of Molymolyopolis was a ruin.
Deepground
Root I
Here in the Ressurected Mole Empire, we are readying a second attack on the monsters. After years in rebuilding and ensconce, we have finally developed an army of Golems powerful enough to destroy 3 of the beasts with ease (though completely ineffective against 4). We expect to return to the grand city of Molymolyopolis by tomarrow!
Insectivora Talpidae!
The basic idea is that it's the same story, but from the moles perspective.
Then I got the idea of my dogs facing an army of angry moles ala LOTR, and the whole thing pretty much turned into this.
~
Fall of the Mole Empire
Narrated by Sniffles the mole
THE STORY YOU ARE ABOUT TO READ IS TRUE.
THE TRUTH HAS BEEN ALTERED TO MAKE THE STORY SOUND COOLER.
Deeproot
Root XVII
As I write in my study, I can barely left my quill, as I am exhausted from the festival. Today, our great and glorious emporer, William the Snookinukums XXX, celebrated his 23rd year of rule over us. He promptly celebrated by opening a new series of mines, to be excavated tomarrow. Afterwards followed a great deal of frivolity, consumption of dainty foods, and much heavy drinking.
On a less important note, there have been reports of severe structural damage to the mines, many of which have collapsed. Advance scouts claim that the damage was caused by gigantic beasts. However, His Majesty assured us that nothing was wrong, and the mines would be excavated on schedule. The advance workers were sent to an insane asylem.
Deeproot
Root XVIII
(The following description is based on interviews of witnesses to the following events, as the Chronicler was not present at the time, allegedly due to a cold.)
Early in the morning, the grand Imperial city of Molymolyopolis was suddenly attacked, as a gigantic, ferocious beast dug through the surface! It was covered in blackest fur, with a white stripe running from his neck to his mouth, which contained horrible, gnashing jaws! The beast mercilessly devoured all within sight, crushed by his awesome jaws! Some unfortunate souls were thrown onto the surface, to be slowly killed by the unyielding brightness of the Bright Circle! The Royal Guard were swiftly dispatched, but had no chance against the monster!
Shortly afterward, the mines were again attacked by a similar monster, this one white with black veils over his eyes. Thousands of moles were killed in the sudden onsauloght! None could escape! The Jackal knew no mercy!
This sudden double attack has shaken the entire Empire. Against the solemn sagacity of his advisors to evacuate, and completely ignoring diplomacy, His Majesty authorized total war against the creatures. Within hours, the entire Mole army was poised for combat, armed to the teeth with every weapon known to molekind, with only odious spite for the creatures. To deal with the rays of the Bright Circle, our scientists swiftly set an UV Ray Shield on the planned battlefield.
Deeproot
Root XIX
As I write this, I am sitting beside his majesty, to document the battle from the stands. The monsters, (which I have dubbed Crescent and Jackal, respecitively) seemed perplexed by the presence of our army, cocking their hideously fuzzy heads. A messenger was sent to the monsters to negotiate. The negotiations were as follows:
"Hear me, giant beasts! In your atrocious attacks against molekind, you have brought the full wrath of William the Snookiwookums XXX and the entirety of the mole empire upon you! But let it not be said that we are not merciful! If you choose to surrender, you shall simply be painlessly killed and turned into pelts to adorn His Majesty's throne room! Do not comply, and you shall be completely and totally annihilated!"
The beasts took a few moments of deliberation before eating the messenger. With a cry of "Imperious Rex!" the army charged into battle, ignorant of the peril! Infantry were scattered like duckpins by their ferocious barks! Artillery found their artillery lasers unable to even remotely sear the beasts adamantine fur! Not even the Air Force could stop them!
One of our more cogitating soldiers, suggested that we hollow the ground beneath them, causing the ground to collapse, which, in turn, causes the monsters to plummet into a bottomless pit from which there is no return!
However, this proved to be a futile gesture, as the hallowed out ground only sank half an inch. All the diggers were eaten.
After 50% of the army was destroyed, a rather vexed Majesty announced he would personally and furtively (the utterance of which swiftly became redundant) go to activate the top-secret weapon, Project Golem. The Royal Guard escorted him to the weapon, located in Lily Canyon.
Ten minutes after their departure, at the zenith of the conflict, a gigantic collososs made entirely of soil made its way onto the battlefield. Nearly 8 inches high, it was equal in height to the mighty Jackal! I was informed by a member of the Royal Guard that this was the top-secret weapon called the Golem, piloted by none other then His Majesty! He then proceeded to make a speech:
"Foolish beasts! You think you stand a chance against my divine right to rule? Bah! You will never understand the power I am entitled to! All exists to bow before me! The moles, you surface dwellers, even the Bright Circle! I am-"
The one called Jackal then smote the Golem, tapping it with it's paw. The Golem promptly crumbled. His Majesty was crushed underneath the dirt.
What followed was mass hysteria as the soldiers and citizens dug for their lives as far as their claws could take them. Within three hours the once glorious city of Molymolyopolis was a ruin.
Deepground
Root I
Here in the Ressurected Mole Empire, we are readying a second attack on the monsters. After years in rebuilding and ensconce, we have finally developed an army of Golems powerful enough to destroy 3 of the beasts with ease (though completely ineffective against 4). We expect to return to the grand city of Molymolyopolis by tomarrow!
Insectivora Talpidae!