Dreamcasting: Adaptations #12 - Conan the Barbarian

Joe Kalicki

Well-Known Member
Nov 11, 2006
Awesome Town, USA
The Rules, copied and pasted

1) The winner of the last round becomes the moderator of the round, and thus gets to choose the property or story in question to be adapted. Winner may also declare whether this property is an animated film, or a live-action one. He must also name the core characters to be cast, which should be at least 4, but no more than 9.

2) Participants may not use actors who have played the role before in the same medium before. Voice talents may not reprise their role, nor can film/TV ones.

3) After the time period set by the moderator, the round is declared closed. People will vote via PM and send it to the moderator, who will count the votes and declare winner. Like the Ultimatization Game, you CANNOT vote for yourself.

4) The winner declared gets to choose the property in the next round.

Round ends November 26.

This Conan movie will focus on the characters in the Conan movie continuity. Any casting beyond that is certainly acceptable, but to keep it simple I'm limiting it to just the most well known characters for Conan noobs.

You must cast these four characters:

Conan the Barbarian. A former slave and gladiator, Conan has escaped that life and become a thief. His thefts often end up getting him involved with wizards and magic. In the movies he was played by California GovernorArnold Achwarzenegger.

Red Sonja. Not in either Conan movie, Red Sonja had her own film in the 80s. By far the most popular of Conan's love interests, I've folded her into the Conan movie world. A fierce fighter, Red Sonja has vowed never to give her love (aka cooter) to a man unless he can beat her in combat. In her film she was portrayed by former Flavor Flav lover Brigitte Nielson.

Subotai. (sorry there's no good info on him) Conan's wise and mystical partner in crime. The brains behind Conan's brawn. In the movie he was portrayed by surfing legend Gerry Lopez.

Thulsa Doom. Leader of a snake cult and killer of Conan's parents, Thulsa Doom is the main villain of the movie. In the film he was played by the most famous voice in the world, James Earl Jones.

Good luck!
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Conan the Barbarian

Cast :

Conan the Barbarian. Paul Levesque , Conan needs to be a big guy , Not a lot of acting involved but needs look like he can kick your *** with ease . Paul Levesque better known as Triple H does just that. I know he is a wrestler so most will over look him but he is also a body builder like Arnold Schwarzenegger was.

Also after seeing the following picture I've been pushing for him as Conan or Thor

Red Sonja. – Uma Thurman – She's beautiful enough for the role plus after Kill Bill I think people would buy her in the role which is important. I think she could bring a lot to the role and make the character as important as Conan

Subotai. – Liam Neeson – Since the role of Conan is needed by someone like Paul Levesque I figure the secondary roles need to be filled by interesting actors / actresses in order to help elevate the film. While it is true Liam Neeson is used a lot in theses games I thought he just suits been the wise old Subotai even if he a different race than shown before it doesn't matter he suits it.

Thulsa Doom. – Michael Clarke Duncan the only person I could think of who's voice is deep like James earl but also looks like he can and has hurt people. While true he is another actor used a lot He also fits the role.
By Crom! An excellent choice!

(No, I've never read a Conan book in my life, but I love saying "By Crom!")
for 2 days I've had the best cast this round
for 2 days I've had the best cast this round

I agree. It's quite an awesome feat.:lol:

Directed by LANGSTA
Screenplay by Kurt Busiek

Conan the Cimmerian - Marcus Schenkenberg OR Christopher Egan
Marcus Schenkenberg is supposed to play a cyborg killing machine in the next installment of the Terminator franchise, Terminator Salvation: The Future Begins. However, if you want someone younger, than Christopher Egan, an Australian actor who played Eragon's brother in the film adaptation of Eragon. With Egan, I'd beef him up a bit and dye his hair black so that he'd fit the role a little better.

Red Sonja of Rogatino - Sienna Guillory
This English actress played Jill Valentine in Resident Evil: Apocalypse, and also made an appearance as Arya in Eragon.

Thulsa Doom - Richard Simmons
Richard Simmons will be placed in this role as a substitute until I find a more suitable black guy for the role.

Sebultan - Stellan Skarsgård
I changed Subotai's name because .... it sounds too Asian.

Valeria - Teresa Palmer
Palmer tried out for the role of Wonder Woman recently.
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I must confer with my fellow God**** Hollywood Genius on my pitch.

Just know that it would not be the Conan you'd all expect.

And Langsta....I am horribly offended at your Urkel cast.
I see I created the lamest Dreamcasting ever. Nice.

Good thing you gave me a second chance with it.

No you didn't , I still can't believe it's between me and Langsta , if no one else does this , sad thing is Langsta will win.
Uh, no. Langsta's cast is horrible, while yours is somewhat respectable (except for HHH).

yes but when are theses ever won on the actual casts? People will vote Langsta but not for Langsta just to vote against me :lol: Bank on it
Here's my cast

Dwayne Johnson as Conan, kinda a no brainer here.

Vanessa Marcil as Red Sonja. She just needs some muscles and we are all set
to go.

Chow Yun Fat as Subotai. He's mystical, Asian, and awesome.

Tommy 'Tiny' Lister as Thulsa Doom. I wanted someone big enough to make the Rock look small. Tiny is big enough for that.

Lastly I added Red Sonja's recurring villian, Kulan Gath, a gaunt sorcerer always ruining her day. Steve Buscemi would be good here if he calms down the crazy and focus on the pyscho.
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