Reasons to hate Wolverine


Well-Known Member
Jun 25, 2004
New Zealand
1. Hes in too many comics!

2. He should only be in one team!

3. Justin Timberlake was in the same area as Wolvie in one of his comics, and Wolvie let him live!

4. He killed The Spot!!!! (I mean, give the guy a break, this is his third death. After Carnage getting torn apart in NA, this is not a good year for my favourite characters!)

Feel free to add more!
5. He's canadian [all in good fun]
6. He ticks off MWF thus leading this board towards its eventually Apocolypse even faster.
He smells bad and has poor hygiene!
On the plus side, he does make a good girl though... X-23 that is, not some cross-dressing moment in the comics. Although that would be interesting... *paints Wolvie's claws pink*
Hey Wolverine is one of my favorite charaters. I agree he's in too many comics. I think he should be on the Astonishing X-men team and the New Avengers and that's it. He is the best at what he does. Which seems to me annoying comic fans.
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9. He has a fan in TGO.
10. He popped the wheels on poor Jimmy's bicycle
11. He ain't dead.
12. He stabbed Spidey.
13. He is controlled by squirrels.
14. He is known as Squirrel Man in Austraila.
15. He left his only son in Savage Land.
16. He married Elektra, ticked DD off.
17. He calls Professor X "Chuck".

Isn't this fun!
18. I don't like him. Nuff said.
19. He's just basically an annoying Canadian clone of me.
oh wolverine how i hate thee....

-your sutpid clawss
-your stupid healing
-your stupid face
-your stupid overpublishing
-your stupid poop.
Ultxon said:
14. He is known as Squirrel Man in Austraila.
This is actually true

20. He's old.
21. He's so damn old but he's not dead.
22. He's flashed every animal in northern Canada.
The Death of Wolverine

25. Unless he's severely de-powered -- and soon -- it will eventually become impossible to write an interesting story about him. At one point, it was stated that 616 Howlett can totally re-generate as long as he has one cell remaining functional. One freaking cell! Unless that's been justifiably retconned -- or forgotten -- it absolutely kills any sense of drama involved with physical conflicts involving Wolvie. I fon't care how many original, intriguing ways writers come up with to make his emotional or mental angst the driving force of the story -- the guy will always be a narrative handicap for writers, at least in his mainstream MU incarnation.

26. His past is continutally brought up and forgotten, as necessary. Make no mistake -- this is an afflication of ALL characters in serial media, but the way it's applied to Wolvie is particularly tiring.

And on a related note...

27. I realize we all have different roles to play in life -- both "real" people and comic characters -- but there's no way a guy can find the hours and emotional resolve to be Wolvie the Dead-beat Father, Wolvie the Ninja Slayer, Wolvie the X-Man, Wolvie the Avenger, Wolvie the Amnesiac, Wolvie the Wife-Stealer, Wolvie the SHIELD Agent, and so forth. Healing factor or not, that kind of diversity goes beyond reasonable suspension of disbelief.
Caduceus said:
24. He's slept with so many people AND DOESN'T REMEMBE 90% OF IT!
Which brings me to...

29. The charming ba$tard can sleep with anybody he pleases, without ever having to worry about catching a sexually-transmitted disease.
30. According to Paradise X, he's the f---ing Missing Link!! (does that bother anyone else? it bothers me...)
31.He's a whinier, wimpier version of Sabretooth...
32.His claws used to be part of his gloves
33.He smells like a wet dog
34.He smokes cigars

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