The Noah Bennet Thread

Hellsbuttmonkey

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Jun 30, 2005
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He deserves his own thread.

Noah Bennet, International Man of Awesome.

This man, dare I say, is as awesome as the Almighty Himself. Yes, as awesome as Bass.

Children fear the Boogeyman in their closet.
The Boogeyman fears Chuck Norris in his closet.
Noah Bennet fears no man for he has no closet, and shoots Chuck Norris for looking at Claire in an inappropriate manner.
 
The 300 Spartans got all their moves from a blurry video of Noah Bennet sleeping.

But the Spartans didn't have video technology, so this one must be a lie.
 
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Noah Bennet is my biological father. He impregnated my mother by looking at her.
 
But the Spartans didn't have video technology, so this one must be a lie.

Duh. It was all sent back in time for them by Hiro.

factcatpm6.png
 
Next you will be telling me French people can't run, or Germans don't like sausage...

Everyone knows people in Haiti either eat memories, stop superpowers from working, or make zombies.
 
Not only can Noah Bennet lift Thor's hammer, he once borrowed it to re-shingle his roof. This was the real reason behind Ragnarok. Thor was pissed when he found out.
 

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