Ultimate Iron Man II series discussion [Card/Ferry] [spoilers]

I couldn't find the relevant Orson Scott Card criticism thread, so I'm posting this here.

Orson Scott Card speaks to SciFiScanner about writing Ultimate Iron Man:
Orson Scott Card said:
I really hate superhero comics. Then Marvel comes to me with this character, and when they told me what it was I said, "Wow, that is even dumber than most superhero comics." This guy is the head of a multi-million dollar international corporation -- that's a full-time job. He is also a scientist-inventor-engineer -- that's a full-time job. And he wears a suit and goes out and save people? But then I found out I could give him a childhood -- that's what I do. So that worked for me. I literally can't write a story I don't believe in. I sit there staring at the screen and nothing happens. I have to wait until I believe in it.
Discuss.
 

Oh. My. God.

So in addition to being one of the worst writers this medium has ever seen, he's a sellout and a whore.

Newsflash, Orson Scott Card - plenty of people have written plenty of good stories about Iron Man over the years. They even made an extremely successful and critically acclaimed movie of the character. Maybe you've heard of it?
 
**** him.

I actually finished this between classes at a borders. I mean I wasn't shocked at how bad it was gonna be. I knew there was no redemption for this.

That quote though just proves he had no passion about the character and probably didn't even pay attention to Millar's Tony Stark.
 
That quote continues the trend of me disliking Orson Scott Card a great deal whenever he says something.
 
Oh wow. The only redemption I felt Card had was that he was a comic fan and tried his best.

But. . . none of it's true.

I hope he wakes up tomorrow married to a man.
 
Oh wow. The only redemption I felt Card had was that he was a comic fan and tried his best.

But. . . none of it's true.

I hope he wakes up tomorrow married to a man.

Post of the Day.
 
Orson Scott Card said:
This guy is the head of a multi-million dollar international corporation -- that's a full-time job. He is also a scientist-inventor-engineer -- that's a full-time job. And he wears a suit and goes out and save people?
What the **** would you know about it? You sit and write made up stories from the schizo brain of yours. Stick to make things up and stop criticizing other peoples, more successful, work.
 
On a whim, I decided to re-read Ultimate Iron Man 1 & 2.

I couldn't even be mad about them ruining a decent character. They are so bad that they are hilarious. To be fair, #2 wasn't nearly as bad as #1, at least the writing. The plot is still complete crap, but it just reads like a boring story.

Well, that is except for the dialog. I think my favorite is in #1 where he kicks a guy in the nuts and his foot falls off, then he says something to the effect of "I miss my foot" or something similarly inane. The woman taking care of him responds with "Why, you miss playing 'This Little Piggy'?" How does a human being write something that stupid, turn it in for approval, and then another human being read it and approve it to represent the quality of their company? It's amazing.

Here are a couple of other winners I had the presence of mind to copy:

"Alcohol is evenly distributed throughout the bloodstream. All your brain tissue will be affected. Even the brains in your butt."

"Is that a gun in your armpit or did you forget to take out the deoderant when you were done with it?"
 
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Somebody posted the Ultimate Iron Man Ultimate Collection on a download site a couple days ago and I downloaded it just for the memories.

It's even worse than I remembered. I made it about 3/4 of the way through issue #2 and couldn't go any further. The dialogue is unbelievable.

I miss ranting about it here.
 
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