Weird Dreams

It is 4:26am and I have decided to come online and post this dream because it is too good to forget.

The setting is my University... sort of. We'll get back to that later. It's basically an outside area. Very generic. I am not present. All of the current Lost characters (except Jack) are gathered together. "Locke" (MIB) is telling them how he has won. Jack appears, beaten and bleeding. Hurley rushes towards him and Jack hugs him. While Locke continues to gloat, Jack whispers into Hurley's ears that he talked to Jacob. Jacob told Jack that Locke doesn't want to get off the island but they still have to stop him... with love. They break the hug, Hurley looking shocked. Lapidus approaches Jack and throws him a rag - Jack coughs a lot of blood into it.

A bit later. Jack and Hurley are sitting down. Lapidus joins them. For some reason, they discuss buying and selling things online. Hurley is complaining because Jack (might have got a plane trip or something). Hurley says he only got Wanted and Incredible Hulk on DVD and a digital camera for his "nerd trade." Jack blames the bad trader.

A young African-American girl appears. She offers to sell them three items - something I have forgotten, gum and love. Hurley buys the gum ("where did you find gum on an island?" Jack asks, wondering how Hurley is going to pass off the fact he is now chewing gum to Locke) and Jack buys the love. Love is a small tab or powder wrapped in tinfoil, like LSD or something. The African-American girl says Jacob tells them good luck and disappear. Jack swallows the love.

Everyone is now sitting at a long table, like a restaurant. Locke is still missing. Jack, Hurley and Lapidus discuss a restaurant across the road. A man is sitting there that looks like John Malkovich. Another bald guy who looks like the exact same person sits next to Jack (who I think was called Wade Wilson) asks which one is the one that looks like Malkovich. Jack responds, "what do you mean which one looks like John Malkovich?" Wade Wilson then puts his menu up over his mouth (I think it was a pizza menu) and whispers to everyone else, "which one looks like John Malkovich?" Everyone ignores him, which I somehow remember commenting on, because I thought it was amusing.

I think the Malkovich looking guy disappeared inside the restarant, the love started to take an effect on Jack and Locke returned but the dream ended and I didn't get to see what happened.
 
I had an AWESOME dream last night. Probably one of the bestest ever.


It all started with me being back at my crappy elementary school because I had a meeting there for whatever reason. I walk out the room I was in to go use the bathroom, but when I get to one, it's closed with a broken water fountain next to it. So I walk down the hallway to another one. When I entered, I noticed there was a room with couches and stuff and I thought, "Awesome! Finally the Men's room gets comfy couches like the Women's!" And when I go in further, a bathroom attendant comes up to me and offers me ritz crackers and ham. I was like, "SCORE!" And though that may seem dirty or whatever because it's in a bathroom, it was all safe and sanitary in the dream.

But the best part was when I walked into another room in the bathroom, it was a friggen club! In a Men's room! IT WAS AWESOME! Food everywhere, hot tubs, water fountains you see in streets! And even water seats where you had nude women all over you. Of course I swore this was all real and had walked into heaven or something.

Too bad I woke up... :(
 
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I had a dream last night where I saw this guy trying to steal a minivan on my street, so I jumped in the passenger seat and put him in an armlock while yelling for somebody to call the cops. But no one was around. So I had to sit there for literally hours pinning the guy waiting for somebody else to walk by. A few people did, but no one really understood what was going on or that they could do anything to help. He tried to stab me in the back of the head a few times with some sort of short bundle of bamboo sticks, but it wasn't sharp. Me and the thief eventually agreed to go do other stuff for the evening and meet back in the car later.

I went to the beach and ran into some friends from college as the sun went down and we all stood around in these white sort of gazebo-tents until fireworks starts, and in the dream all the sparks turned into big silver leaf-like confetti that you could catch. After all this, I went back to my street, got in the van with the thief and resumed the earlier situation. Finally some friends showed up and took over pinning him while I called 911. On the other end, there was a sloooowww message saying the new official number to dial was 9121, so I had to do that, at which point they said they'd just send over some guys from the fire station to get him because all the cops were busy. The firefighters showed up, drove the car to the fire station, and carried the thief inside.

The thief actually turned out to be a pretty all right guy. We talked a bunch during the hours leading up to this. His name was Joe Papigleone or something, and I shook his hand before they took him away, and everyone was like "Serious dude, you should really try and clean up your act because you're pretty cool".

I got home, which was like some dingy hardware/convenience store inside for some reason. My mom was about to go upstairs but we were talking and she said something about "the k-word", which she wouldn't say. I had no idea what this was, but then on TV(an old one with dials that was embedded in a cluttered store shelf) somebody mentioned the word "kleopic", definition: an almost religious sort of reverence for sex in and of itself.

I was then kind of worried about going down into the basement because I realized how creepy the house seemed and thought I might see a ghost.
 
The other night, dreamt I was in my room when another me walks in, wearing an ornate robe and a ridiculous wig made of cauliflower and cotton balls.

Other Me: Get up, you idiot.
Me: Who are you?
Other Me: I'm your dad, you *******. Now get up.
Me:...You are not my dad.
"Dad": Shut the **** up.
Me: For one thing, my dad doesn't swear.
"Dad": ******.

(For the record, he was actually swearing. There weren't any censor bleeps in the dream.) Anyway, this coversation goes on for a while, with me pointing out why he can't be my dad and him insulting me.

Then lightning strikes.

Then horrible laughter, not unlike anything done by the Joker in BTAS rings throughout the room. It's coming from "Dad," yet his lips aren't moving at all. He rips off his clothes, his wig, his face, to reveal what he really is. He's a giant, lifesize Ken doll. He just stares lifelessly me at me, dead eyes pentrating me and laughter echoing from his painted on, never-moving smile. (Kind of like Toyman from DCAU.)

He starts strangling me, the face is right in front of me, it is completely and totally motionless, he won't stop smiling, and he won't stop ****ing laughing.

Yeah, that was a bad dream.
 
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captaincanuck65 said:
has anyone ever realized they were dreaming and done crazy stuff?

I used to know a guy who said that happened to him all the time
Click to expand...

Lucid dreaming. We've talked about it a bunch in the thread(too bad the search function still doesn't work because there was a lot of really cool stuff). I've had many excellent experiences with it.
 
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I had a really cool and oddly(for me) vague one last night where I somehow traveled through time and met this girl from the year 1000 AD, as well as some other people our age from 3000 BC. They all seemed pretty normal and really easy to relate with, but found the fact that I was basically some far-off future guy really cool. We were now all in the year 10,000 AD though. The place we were in was a public square of some kind although it resembled a sort of giant indoor playground with gray carpeting and all these multi-level walkways people were travelling along, as well as huge plexiglass windows, through which you could see a sort of airport outside only with silver planes flying right up into space. I had a better grasp of a lot of what was going on than they did so I explained a lot of it to them, but it was still pretty amazing. There was one part here where we used some sort of really bright futuristic laptop to pick a location to travel to, and the girl was really pale with black hair. It bugs me I don't remember more right now.
 
Two dreams I had last night, one after another. Both ended in cliff hangers, but they were interesting.

In the first one, I was a member of a government sponsered super hero team. I had fire powers, but I also had the power to let me see the world as if I was reading a book. I could see it from the perspective of a reader, and gain knowledge on things that happened that I normally wouldn't know about. (You know when you read a book and it cuts away to a scene with other characters? I could see those even if I wasn't present for them.) I kept this power to myself, since it made it difficult for me to view people as anything but literary devices, and that's an awkward thing to bring up in coversation.

We fight aliens a lot, and this one time I decoded some intercepted alien messages.

Anyway, the team leader is a traitor, which I only learn about a minute before he actually betrays us to the aliens. With his help, the aliens cut off our allies in the government and almost all of our resources as they begin taking over the world. I manage to mobilize the rest of the team, and tell them about the traitor. They have doubts, since as far as they know, he's in the sealed up White House trying to save the President. To prove them wrong, I call him up on the speaker phone. All diologue is paraphrased:

Traitor: Steven! Thank god you're alive! I've got the the President and his cabinet, but we'll need some backup if they're going to-
Me: Cut the crap. We're on our way, yeah, but not for what you think. We know you're behind this and we're coming to beat your ass.
Traitor: ...are you OK? Look, it's been a rough night, I'd know that better then anyone. But there's no need to-
Me: I am feeling a distinct lack of crap being cut. I know you're a traitor. Don't believe me? Here's what else I know. Your sister died in an airplane crash. You developed your powers about five years earlier then you said. You and the alien queen are talking about getting married. You should stop talking to yourself in "secure locations." You never know who might be listening.
Traitor: ...really now. I must say, you've put some thought into this.
Me: Not really. I only realized it about an hour ago. But then, you were always the thinker. The leader. The one everyone looked up to. No one would suspect you. Not even the reader.
Teammate: Why do you keep talking about this reader stuff?
Me: Trying to prove a point. I'll explain later.
Traitor: No, I think Sara has a point here. I think you've been reading a bit too much. I told you it was a bad idea to decode those intercepted messages. The human mind was never meant to read them. Who knows what it could have done to yours...
Me: Will you stop it? We both know how this is going to go down. You're the murderer in the third act. I'm Deus Ex Machina.
Traitor: Funny. I think it may be the other way around.

At this point, the traitor uses some sort of device and my powers go out of control, causing me to not only burn and cripple Sara, but make it look like it was intentional. That's all the evidence the rest of the group needs to decide I'm the traitor.

And then I wake up. Since it's summer, I go back to sleep. This time, I dream that my neighborhood is taken over by palnt-based aliens, Invasion of the Body Snatchers style. They claim that what they are doing is justice becuase of how humanity treats the enviroment. I point out that they're hypocrites, seeing as they plan to do something very similar to the Earth. I team up with a sentient paint can and manage to deafeat the alien leader. Then the alien princess arrives and arrests everyone. While she disapproves of her people's actions, she doesn't see a reason why they are wrong. She turns to me and orders me to give an explanation for why humanity is a good thing.

again, I wake up.
 
I dreamt that I was riding up a huge escalator to this giant, brightly-lit food court place, one whole side of which was windows. I was looking after a mentally challenged person played by Brendan Fraser, who wanted to go to McDonalds, so we went to that counter and he had this precisely memorized meal he wanted. There was a special combo that involved the ketchup on the burgers being in the shape of a classical painting, and he ordered the one of the prophet Joel from the Sistine Chapel ceiling, but asked if they had a different one with Alvin and the Chipmunks, which I still thought was a real classical painting at the time. The waitress very patiently explained that the ones you saw were all they had, which he accepted and we went over to sit at the tables.

At the tables, he turned into this acquaintance of mine who started talking about how he loved exercising but couldn't lately because he had caught "the fung". I wasn't sure what he meant, but said "Dragggg, man" in the voice of Otto from The Simpsons. He found this hilarious and we both started quoting Otto and I wondered briefly why Otto, who wore a tuxedo, looked and sounded so much like that other character, the bus driver, whose name I couldn't remember.

TALES! OF! INTEREST!
 
One huge dreams.

One involved the murder of a co-worker, and the rest of us searching his house for a document which would destroy the US government.
 
Last night I dreamed that I was playing a virtual reality Pokemon game.

I was working with the Pokemon League to bring down a secretive criminal organation. I corner one of the organization's core members, Sabrina (you know, the Saffron City Gym Leader). She starts running and her guards blindside me, but my Pokemon handle them and I'm able to catch up. (I remember feeling extremely cocky, as I had transfered my parties form other Pokemon games and made the best team I could with them.)

I catch up to Sabrina and we get into a big fight. Eventually my Feraligator starts fighting her Alakazam and they're perfectly matched. I see that one of my associates is sneaking up on Sabrina, so I decide to stall.

I hold up one of my Poke balls and bluff. "This ball holds a Sirskit that knows Protect. I release him, and Albert here gets a buddy that can counter your every move. Then you'll be double teamed by a alligator of mass destruction and an unstoppable lightningbug. You can do the math."

"That's the worst bluff I've ever heard," she says.

I throw the Poke Ball. "Yeah. That's what they all say."

My associate gets backhanded by Sabrina before he can take him out. The released Pokemon is a Sirskit, but it doesn't know Protect.

Then Sabrina just walks across the battlefield and deacks me.

I can't emember the rest, though I do know Digimon and evil pool parties were involved.
 
I just one about a woman in the middle of a forest wanting to watch a black and white movie that was half The Wizard of Oz and half ET and a man who didn't want to watch it and ended up going to war. The war was some really weird steampunk retro thing.

Then my sister and I were trying to buy cheap soda in the supermarket.
 
Just had this strange, superhero-heavy, extremely vivid dream. Excerpts include(beware, rambling ahead):

I'm looking around some old comics from my room, but am on the roof of my room, which resembles a really cool rooftop from the first Burton Batman film. I find this secret pocket in one of the comics which contains this folded-up, really glossy poster. It's multi-sided and can be like three different posters depending on how you unfold it. A group shot of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles from the first film, a lineup of four mini-posters featuring each of them, an elaborate Batman Forever group shot poster I haven't seen before, and one made of sixteen boxes, each with a different photo from the original Batman movies in it: Nicholson Joker, the Joker's logo(which was really detailed and more accurate than I'd remembered in real life), Keaton Batman, O'Donnel Robin, a weird cartoon version of Jim Carrey Riddler, the Batmobile, a shot of Two-Face dressed as a ringmaster with white clown paint on both sides of his face and a stylized black bat over his chin and mouth, and a really dark actual photo of Jim Carrey Riddler. The whole poster is extremely cool and I'm really glad to have found it.

Later in the dream, my sister takes a look at it and then leaves with it. It's like a joke at first but then she says she's keeping it, even though we both know she's not as deserving. She's already hidden it somewhere. We have a huge argument which goes on for a while but later I go downstairs, my dad intervenes, and we convince her to give it back. She goes upstairs to get it. At this point I remember that my dad and I are both Christopher Reeve-esque Superman, me having inherited his powers, and I use X-Ray vision to see where she's hidden it(first time I can remember using this power in a dream). I see her retrieve it from a crevice in some sort of ice cavern, a wall of which secretly intersects the inside of a wall in our house. She brings it down and I put it somewhere safe, and then go to explore this ice cavern thing.

I'm watching a scene from ''Batman Returns''. The Penguin has broken into the Batcave, had a violent battle with Batman, and is about to try and kill him with his last gasp of energy. This frost-covered, weird looking elevator platform with odd machinery on it comes down from the ceiling somewhere and crushes him at the last second, saving Batman.

I'm riding in the passenger seat of a really cool, fancy car with Michael Gough Alfred, who's dressed kind of like an old-fashioned European Santa Claus, with this really cool hat, a white robe with fancy trim, silver and gold tassels and a miniature Christmas tree in one of the pockets. He's driving down a tunnel which is getting progressively better lit and colder. He reaches this intersection. We're in what looks like the rotunda of an underground gothic ice palace. I recognize the same area from the Penguin part before, and see the same elevator platform come down on its own. I know Keaton Bruce Wayne would typically be riding it, but he's already deep inside the Batcave somewhere. Alfred gets out and heads down another tunnel carrying a lantern, and I "remember" from the film that he emerges in the actual cave with temporarily blue skin and icicles on his kickass, pointed beard. I head through the archway behind the elevator and into the main cave.

The Batcave is about the size of a cathedral carved in blue-gray stone and ice, with huge sections carved into the floors and walls to hold different vehicles and equipment. It's filled with strange memorabilia, like a very realistic prop martian from Mars Attacks!(Wayne points this out and says he's a huge Burton fan), life-sized statues of each kind of alien from the Alien films, statues of these other giant, weird, claymation aliens with bulging, googly eyes, and many different replica dinosaurs. In one of the corners of the cave, a pond-like area is carved out and painted blue with a diorama of a life-sized pterosaur divebombing a pleasiosaur, both suspended by wires. The whole cave is lit by dim, multicoloured lights, mostly blue and pink.

It transitions here without me realizing it. The cave is the headquarters of the Fantastic Four now, and Johnny Storm is Bradley Cooper. He's extremely smooth and talks about the publicity of the team and how it's his job to make them look good. Various publicity people are working around the cave. The Fantasticar is in the middle of the cave, on the floor that used to be in front of the batcomputer. It's glorious. I go over and touch it and it's completely realistic. Then I realize that while the real Johnny is talking, a "public" Johnny is having sex with Jessica Biel in the backseat of the Fantasticar while the rest of the team is pretending to drive and laugh. I think this is funny and go back to talking to Johnny for a while, then leave.

Now I'm in this crazy movie with a bunch of my guy friends where we're racing down this whole mountain, starting off snowy but eventually getting warmer and muddier. The movie is hilarious and filled with action as we rocket down the mountain in soapbox car things, going off these huge jumps. Caddyshack-Bill Murray and John Candy are there, while Chevy Chase is giving commentary on the whole race. Then it turns out the mountain is also being used for dumping garbage, so the lower levels are covered in it. The smell is almost unbearable and I know if I breath in I will probably throw up. I see a diaper fly past me and hear it hit one of my friends from grade school's cars behind me and hear him vomit. I can't help but laugh.

I talk to another friend of mine in mid-race and lament that had we "seen" this movie at age 14 or so it would've been by far the funniest movie of all time, but we're more mature now. Even so, this whole thing is hilarious. We eventually make it to the finish line by going over a huge jump off this mud and dirt-covered rickety wooden ramp and landing in a gigantic pile of garbage. We all laugh hysterically, then go to get ready because we're going to go to this job placement seminar.

I get there and meet up with my friends. It's being held in this giant, futuristic room in a big mall/government building of some kind, but it also kind of resembles the icy Batcave. The leader of the seminar is this rowdy, vivacious guy in his fifties who acts like one of those big rich Texan tycoons and talks about all the opportunities out there. I say to myself, **** it, I'm going to law school! But then I wonder if I'll just end up working as a legal clerk for years.

The guy then says he hasn't talked about one job yet.... JOB PLACEMENT SEMINAR HOLDER! He gives this impassioned speech about how he may not be famous, or that important, but he has what he considers to be the best job in the world, because he meets great young people every week and knows how to PARTY DOWN. He's apparently set us all up with free hotel rooms, all the liquor we want to drink, and this weekend is going to be an gigantic, unforgettable party throughout the entire hotel. The speech is so funny I laugh so hard that I feel like I've almost cracked a rib, and call my mom to tell her about it, but she sounds extremely concerned about the rib thing and is kind of a downer. I limp on but then the rib heals and I quickly feel way better.

~~~~

HOLY ****. Not the longest dream I've ever had by a longshot, but probably the longest I've ever posted here, and one of the strangest. The timeline is also bizarre. This feels pretty accurate by I also have some memory of the end part there transitioning into the beginning part in the first place. Christ. I just had to rapidly post all this while it was still fresh in my head. If anyone made it through, kudos.
 
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