How to retcon Ultimate Iron Man?

Lynx said:
Who's worse? Claremont or Card?

THE WORLD MAY NEVER KNOW.

Claremont just got old, when he was in his game, he kicked ***.

and anyways, I much prefer Claremont's Magneto (not as written in Excalibur, but the more humanized Mags in the 80s) than Morrison's... that was the one thing that I REALLY didn't like about New X-Men, but that's off topic...

Card is worse, because he might have written one good book once... Claremont wrote good books for twenty years, and singlehandedly created the world the X-Men are in today... so yeah.
 
Dr.Strangefate said:
Claremont just got old, when he was in his game, he kicked ***.

and anyways, I much prefer Claremont's Magneto (not as written in Excalibur, but the more humanized Mags in the 80s) than Morrison's... that was the one thing that I REALLY didn't like about New X-Men, but that's off topic...

Card is worse, because he might have written one good book once... Claremont wrote good books for twenty years, and singlehandedly created the world the X-Men are in today... so yeah.

You're right. Claremont was awesome in the late 80's / early 90's. But what he's doing now. . .I dunno, it overshadows the old work. Some of Card's books have been good, too.

I dunno, I hate them both now. I suppose I dislike Card more, however, because, in my opinion, he's ruining a characters origin.

ANYWAYS! Back on topic!

Card: We have you now, Mr. Stark! We will now alter your memories for you to believe you are a FREAK with brain tissue all over your body! You will also believe yourself to have a healing factor! MUWAHAHAHAHAHA!

Tony: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
 
The needlessly convoluted solution:

Tony: Someone hired Orson Scott Card to drive me insane
by having him trying to convince me that my body was mostly brain tissue, but who is behind this? Who?!

Meanwhile in the 616 universe, a mysterious figure plots.

Mystery Man: Wonderful, phase 732 of my master plan, screwing with an alternate version of Tony Stark, is almost complete, soon nothing will stop the schemes of .... Mr. Sinister! Ha, ha, ha!

The End.... for now.
 
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Yes he was. This is the guy who made Nightcrawler the son of the devil. Game, point, match.

Doctor: So Mr. Stark I have to recommend to put the Iron Man thing on hold given the kind of manic delusions your brain tumour is causing.

Tony: Cut off my foot, I dare you, go on!

Doctor: Um... no....
 
Blacksword said:
Yes he was. This is the guy who made Nightcrawler the son of the devil. Game, point, match.
And so I thought. He made him the son of a guy who people THINK is the devil, not the actual one.

And Card is worse than Austen, still, which than making Austen not THAT bad.
 
Same difference.

And besides Austin was so bad that he went from one of the most prolific writers in comicdom, to the point where his name on the cover was enough to put a book out of print. It's one thing for the intellectual snobs to call you a bad writer but when the general public finds you bad enough to not buy anything you write, you have reached a whole new level of suck. And the general public will buy anything (Britney Spears is proof of that). To make the guys who buy a title simply because it's got an X on the cover or says Superman, stop buying those comics, you have to be the worst writer of all time.
 
TheManWithoutFear said:
I'd like to think Comic book fans are smarter than MTV viewers.

I'd like to think that too, but unfortunately I'm constantly reminded that isn't always the case.
 
icemastertron said:
We all know its Card. Even Austen wasn't THAT bad.

Claremont can be forgiven since we can just attribute he's new mistakes on senility. And I forgave Austen for not screwing up the Ultimate Universe with his Gambit story(Which, ironically, was probably his best story). Card made the grave error of ******* with the UU.
 
TheManWithoutFear said:
I'd like to think Comic book fans are smarter than MTV viewers.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....Aaaah...that's hilarious...




In the final issue of UIM:

PAGE 22:
PANEL 1: We see Tony leaving his office building during a whirling snow storm.

PANEL 2: The camera pulls back and we see the building from farther away.

PANEL 3: The camera pulls back very far, and a slight reflection hangs over the scene.

PAGE 23:
PANEL 1: The camera pulls back to reveal the truth: the building sits in a snowglobe, shaken and swirling. It rests in a pair of small hands.

PANEL 2: The camera pulls back more to reveal a small autistic boy shaking the snowglobe.

PANEL 3: We see his parents watching him.

MOTHER: What's he doing?

FATHER(1): The same thing he does every day.
FATHER(2): He just sits there and looks at that snowglobe.

PANEL 4: The boy places the snowglobe on a coffee table.

PANEL 5: The globe stands there and the snow settles.

THE END.
 
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moonmaster said:
In the final issue of UIM:

PAGE 22:
PANEL 1: We see Tony leaving his office building during a whirling snow storm.

PANEL 2: The camera pulls back and we see the building from farther away.

PANEL 3: The camera pulls back very far, and a slight reflection hangs over the scene.

PAGE 22:
PANEL 1: The camera pulls back to reveal the truth: the building sits in a snowglobe, shaken and swirling. It rests in a pair of small hands.

PANEL 2: The camera pulls back more to reveal a small autistic boy shaking the snowglobe.

PANEL 3: We see his parents watching him.

MOTHER: What's he doing?

FATHER(1): The same thing he does every day.
FATHER(2): He just sits there and looks at that snowglobe.

PANEL 4: The boy places the snowglobe on a coffee table.

PANEL 5: The globe stands there and the snow settles.

THE END.
:D :D
 

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