How many 5 year-olds could you take on at once?

slimjim

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The question: How many 5 year-olds could you take on at once?

The specifics:

- You are in an enclosed area, roughly the size of a basketball court. There are no foreign objects.

- You are not allowed to touch a wall.

- When you are knocked unconscious, you lose. When they are all knocked unconscious, they lose. Once a kid is knocked unconscious, that kid is "out."

- You're fighting them all at once.

- Don't say "OH I would never hit a 5 year old." Lets say hypothetically it's the end of the world in these are evil rapid zombie 5 year olds out for your life...so no holding back

Now with that being said i could take out a good 60+ before i am completely burned out and a **** load swarm me.
 

Ultxon

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What's the boy girl ratio here? Not that it may matter too much at this early stage. Are we sure we can't use a foriegn project; I've always wanted to test my practical marvel omnibus theory [How many times could you beat someone with one until it breaks?]

Woth that in mind, I could probably take at least 30 just by crushing them into a wall [one of the benefits of being 200 pds], after that I'd say max 70.
 

ProjectX2

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This would be fun. I have no idea how many I could take out, but I think I'd just keep going because it's an opportunity to hit these little bastards.
 

Iceshadow

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Are we allowed to cripple them i.e. reversing their knees with my foot?

If so I could do that all day.
 
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Friday

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I have no clue. I think my biggest fear is that I'm a tall guy so a 5 year old comes in about ball level for me. Get too many of them and the cheap shot will happen, then they swarm.
 

Ultimate Quicksilver

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Can you have a weapon?
Well anyway, I'm pretty big, I could easily pull a Juggernaut on them (already did something like that with some 16 years old), I would use protection in my testicles though.
 

fenway

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I am the father of a 4 year old girl and a 3 year old girl

I feel I am qualified to discuss the fighting ferocity of a five year old.

None of us would last 5 minutes against even one - two minutes if she's mad
 

E

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I am the father of a 4 year old girl and a 3 year old girl

I feel I am qualified to discuss the fighting ferocity of a five year old.

None of us would last 5 minutes against even one - two minutes if she's mad

Exactly.

You guys are way too overconfident and/or macho to answer this realistically.

I would be shocked if the best of you could take on 10.
 

ProjectX2

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I thought it was a proven fact that parents were weaklings?
 

TwilightEL

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Slimjim gave so many specifications, but he never mentioned whether or not you could have weapons.

I remember at my old tae kwon do school, the instructors were total ******* about enforcing sparring rules on the little kids. So the little brats would always punch and kick below the belt and just fling themselves at you, and nobody would stop them. And us bigger kids couldn't even hit them hard the proper way because they're freaking five year olds, so the little brats thought they were soooo strong when really they would get ripped from limb to limb.

The point of this story is, little kids are vicious bastards when they're in a fighting mood. One is easy to take down, but it's not "how many five-year-olds can you kill in a row", it's "how many could you take on at once".

Unless you have a mace or chainsaw, probably not that many.
 

SSJmole

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As many 5 year olds as Neo fought agent smiths!
 
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moonmaster

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Exactly.

You guys are way too overconfident and/or macho to answer this realistically.

I would be shocked if the best of you could take on 10.
I have an 8-year-old cousin who has been pretty consistantly obsessed with trying to beat me up since he was about 5.

Without a weapon, I imagine most of you could handle ten.

See, one five-year-old punching at you is just kind of funny. Thirty of them is ****ing death. Little kids are like animals, they just don't give a ****. They'll just come at you with all of their limbs moving all at once and a large group of them would have you on the floor in seconds. So those of you who are talking about taking on 60 or 70, congratulations, I'm laughing at you.

Oh, and this is funny since the other night I was watching "Hostel" and there's a great scene where a bunch of little thug kids crush two guys' skulls in and smash their car.

Those little kids are ****ing scary.
 
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Gideon Stargrave

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Meh. I'm sure that five year olds all have glass jaws. All you need to do is make sure that you've covered your junk, and they've got nothing on you.

You're all assuming that they're smart enough to make this a team effort, whereas they're five years old. They don't know ANYTHING. Just set them against each other. It couldn't be that hard.
 

TwilightEL

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Meh. I'm sure that five year olds all have glass jaws. All you need to do is make sure that you've covered your junk, and they've got nothing on you.

You're all assuming that they're smart enough to make this a team effort, whereas they're five years old. They don't know ANYTHING. Just set them against each other. It couldn't be that hard.

No, these are like zombie five-year-olds. Besides, it SPECIFICALLY SAYS in the THREAD TITLE that you're taking ALL OF THEM ON AT ONCE. All these five-year-olds are rushing you at once. They are not lining up to fight you one by one. This is a mob and they will crawl over the backs of the fallen.

Anyways, I'm a girl and I don't have junk, and I seriously doubt I could beat more than a dozen five-year-olds.
 

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