Reasons to hate Wolverine

Synch

Well-Known Member
47. He's the best character Marvel ever had, and he single-handedly saved Marvel Comics by becoming the most popular character in their history of publishing. Second in the world only to a certain Kryptonian.
 

moonmaster

Without him, all of you would be lost souls roamin
48. Jewel wrote a song about him: (from Modern Humorist.com)

"A Little Prayer (Wolverine’s Theme)"
from "X-Men"
Lyrics by John Aboud

Cold shiny claws
Pop out from my paws
To slay the evil mutants,
But they can’t stop
Anti-mutant laws
Which spread with such virulence.

Normal humans suspect
They’ll be crushed like insects
Sometime in the near future.
Professor X
Calmly interjects
Our wise but crippled tutor.

My mutant chromosomes
And the strong metal in my bones
Help me fight Sentinel robot drones
And I heal very quickly.

We’re special, see,
Born differently
The children of the Atom
Senator Kelly
Calls me "mutie"
He’ll taste my adamantium.

Cut you down to size
Cream and murderize
Sabertooth like so much spinach.
Rays from Cyclops’s eyes
Will finalize
Big fights I can not finish.

My mutant chromosomes
And the
Strong metal in my bones
Help me
Fight Sentinel robot drones
And I heal very quickly​
 

TheManWithoutFear

#1 reason not to join UC
Synch said:
47. He's the best character Marvel ever had, and he single-handedly saved Marvel Comics by becoming the most popular character in their history of publishing. Second in the world only to a certain Kryptonian.
:shifty:
 

moonmaster

Without him, all of you would be lost souls roamin
49. He can drink gallons of alchohol and never get drunk (unlike MWoF)

50. He can pull of the "yellow tights" look.

51. He once worked as a spy with Richard and Mary Parker. Seriously.

52. He's Canadian.

53. Parents don't mind that their children's favorite Marvel "superhero" is a homocidal maniac.

54. He can survive without food by eating his own flesh.

55. He's got a thing for Asian chicks.

56. He was once a member of the Fantastic Four.

57. He is very comfortable with his body (as evidenced by his frequent nudity)

58. He has slept with women who are a fifth or so his age. (now that's a may/december romance!)

59. No one finds it odd that he has spent an awful lot of time in the company of adolescent girls.

60. He has changed his look more than Madonna.

61. He has been referred to as a "gay disco bunny".
 

IcyFlames

Well-Known Member
62. Has worst temper ever.

63. Is supposed to be a great hunter but hasn't found Osama Bin Laden yet.

64. Worst Hairstyle ever (With Longshot's mullet a close second)

65. Stabbed Magneto (Master of Magnetism) with metal claws (yeah, metal) multiple times.

66. Has appeared in every book except Mary Jane: Homecoming (but there's still a couple issues left - give it time).

67. The "Verb" ads.
 

Ice

Teh Sexy Monkey Queen
IcyFlames said:
66. Has appeared in every book except Mary Jane: Homecoming (but there's still a couple issues left - give it time).
Really?

I haven't found him in Young Avengers, Runaways, Marvel Adaventure Spider-Man (and when it was Marvel Age), Marvel Age Fantastic Four, Supreme Power issues I've seen....honestly, the list can go on and on and on.....
 

Dr.Strangefate

He Sees You When You're Sleeping. He Knows When Yo
68. He wore that REDICULOUS costume during the Pheonix Saga
69. He survived plumeting into the sun
70. He says "bub"
71. He was originally a Hulk bad guy who was too crappy for Hulk comics, so Claremont stole him...
72. He was on Alpha Flight (weirdest team ever, a furry berserker, a guy in a supersuit, a girl with thick glasses, a tall hairy guy, a dwarf, a gay elf and his schizophrenic sister [actually, hes not an elf, Loki was f-cking with him], and an eskimo)
73. He's killed pretty much EVERYONE he loves (Jean, the girl from Origin)
74. His undercover identity involves an eyepatch and a cowboy hat, yet no one notices...
75. He killed his fiance's father...
76. He's shorter than a Labrador Retriever
77. He is a Samurai
78. He is a Ninja
79. He refers to himself as a "Canuck" which is worse than actually BEING a "Canuck"
80. In an issue of The Punisher, the Midget mob, who had been cutting people's legs off from the knees down, tries to recruit him, since he's short enough. Then the Punisher blows off his face with a shotgun.
81. He actually has a long-term friendship with something called "Doop"
82. Hugh Jackman's qualifications for X-Men was being in Oklahoma!, the rogers and hammerstein peice of ****.... oh, i mean, Musical. (I mean, i love Hugh Jackman, but the line of progression makes no sense... Broadway => X-Men)
83. He made out with his Captain's wife... a lot
84. He got Mr. Fantastics powers in X4... so he was Metal... and rubbery... o_O
85. He was a Horseman of Apocalypse, and he used a sword (because you totally need a sword when you're Wolverine... *rolls eyes*)
 

Nurhachi

Well-Known Member
TheManWithoutFear said:
I hate Wolverine more than anyone but seriously he's a decent character he's just overrated... that's all.

The sonovamother killed SPOT!!!! WHO WOULD DO THAT? Dont give me that overrated bull****!!! He killed Spot and let Justin Timberlake live. HE KILLED SPOT AND LET TIMBERLAKE LIVE!

*shakes fist*


:cry:

You know that New Avengers has the Spot Killer AND the Carnage Killer in their team? Dammit!
 

nigma

Well-Known Member
Nurhachi said:
LET TIMBERLAKE LIVE!
(which is this so i can get it and burn it?)

86:he let a guy live who's girlfriend dumped him for z rated dancer.
87: his biggest fan is Spiderman (USM)
88: he's died more times than Leonardo DiCaprio (titanic, hate him too)
89: he’s been shot at more times than a rich white kid in the projects :innocent:
 

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