Ultxon
Well-Known Member
Would you know how to rape someone's soul?
[to keep on topic]
I once smashed my brother's head open while running down a hall. Hit him into a doorknob, he had to go to the hospital and everything, I never got punished.
The Confessional
- Thread starter Victor Von Doom
- Start date
Would you know how to rape someone's soul?
[to keep on topic]
I once smashed my brother's head open while running down a hall. Hit him into a doorknob, he had to go to the hospital and everything, I never got punished.
the watcher
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- May 3, 2005
- Messages
- 6,530
Ultxon said:
Please... I from Chicago. That's like a right of passage.
MaxwellSmart
Well-Known Member
Yeah, you sound like you've had your head bashed open a few times.the watcher said:
You just left your self wide open and I could let it pass.
Sacred&Profane
Well-Known Member
I work as a range monkey/ bag boy at a local country club. This provides fun opportunities, such as driving around in a golf cart all day listening to music and getting paid $6, plus double-didget cash tips for it. Of course, picking up golf balls by hand until the sprinklers come on is a pain in the ***, but it all balances out.
Because I get to smash **** in the golf cart. And I haven't gotten in trouble yet.
I have smashed through the back of a wagon, put a huge hole in a fence, ran over chipmunks, and I *think* I smashed another fence; I don't quite remember, but I'm pretty sure it was me. I should be fired.
Because I get to smash **** in the golf cart. And I haven't gotten in trouble yet.
I have smashed through the back of a wagon, put a huge hole in a fence, ran over chipmunks, and I *think* I smashed another fence; I don't quite remember, but I'm pretty sure it was me. I should be fired.
Last edited:
moonmaster
Without him, all of you would be lost souls roamin
- Joined
- Feb 23, 2005
- Messages
- 13,670
Neither can I.ultimatedjf said:
After we took the training wheels off, I kept on falling off. After two or three tries, I just gave up. I've never encountered any serious reason to ride a bike since, so I don't think it's that bad.
But yeah, I'm a total quitter.
You're just saying that because you have a bike for an avatar.Ultimate MJ said:
You'll be riding on your bike and I'll be cruising past at 40 mph in my car.
Haha, sucker! Enjoy your two wheels! Hahaha!
I call that "Saturday Night".Ultxon said:
Representin' Chi-Town! Southside, Southside, We 'bouts to set this party off right!the watcher said:
*awkwardly tries to form "C" gang sign with fingers*
Hibiki
Really is pretentious, no matter what she says. Do
moonmaster said:
Just pretend you're holding a cup.
thee great one
Master of TOG-fu.
Hibiki said:
There's a picture I can't get out of my head.
Hibiki
Really is pretentious, no matter what she says. Do
I once dated a guy long enough so he would buy me a 9megapixel digital camera. That baby cost like 500 bucks. I am currently selling it for about 250 -300 bucks.
Ok, my current boyfriend is actually my ex-boyfriend's best friend. Except my current boyfriend hated him because my ex yelled at my bf's younger brother for typing," After a hard days work, I like to unwind by taking a nice long ****" on his FFXI shell group. He first dated me out of spite. My ex then came over just as we were in the middle of a love session, sat down, and started talking to us like nothing had happened. Then all he said to my bf, "J wtf? I thought we were buds." He said," We were. Until about five minutes ago." My bf then felt somewhat bad and took us all out for pizza at CiCi's(don't know if that place is national). It was awkward at first. But then we all started laughing the minute my ex left.
Ok, my current boyfriend is actually my ex-boyfriend's best friend. Except my current boyfriend hated him because my ex yelled at my bf's younger brother for typing," After a hard days work, I like to unwind by taking a nice long ****" on his FFXI shell group. He first dated me out of spite. My ex then came over just as we were in the middle of a love session, sat down, and started talking to us like nothing had happened. Then all he said to my bf, "J wtf? I thought we were buds." He said," We were. Until about five minutes ago." My bf then felt somewhat bad and took us all out for pizza at CiCi's(don't know if that place is national). It was awkward at first. But then we all started laughing the minute my ex left.
MaxwellSmart
Well-Known Member
That reminds me of the Heinekin commercial where the chick sits at the bar waiting for a guy to buy her a drink and then leaves and gives it to her brother, just yours was totally worse. I hope he at least got some in return(don't answer that).Hibiki said:
nigma
Well-Known Member
damn, i didn't know so many people didn't know how to ride a bike, helpfull hint, if you can't ride a pedal bike, don't even look at a motor bike, cuz that takes ALOT more balance, and hurts worse too if you fall.
i've lied to soo many people to sell stuff, that its 2nd nature now.
"is this new candy bar any good?"
me: "it's very good"
truth: it taste like something that came out of a racoon.
and i've never really been to the point of 'angry' and cuz of this never been in a fight...i think people are just scared i'll blow up there home or something.
i'll have more of later....
i've lied to soo many people to sell stuff, that its 2nd nature now.
"is this new candy bar any good?"
me: "it's very good"
truth: it taste like something that came out of a racoon.
and i've never really been to the point of 'angry' and cuz of this never been in a fight...i think people are just scared i'll blow up there home or something.
i'll have more of later....
Friday
Well-Known Member
Yes. Yes it is.Hibiki said:
One time some of my friends got ahold of a taser. Things said that night include
"Tase him in the neck, it'll hurt more"
And
"Mike's in there with Amber. We should just kick the door open and Tase them before they know whats going on."
Last edited:
Hibiki
Really is pretentious, no matter what she says. Do
MaxwellSmart said:
He did, but it was more pity than for the camera.
Victor Von Doom
Fist of teh Internets.
Compared to my confessionals---all of these confessionals are the equivelant to a 5th grader saying he doesn't know his times-tables.
I feel like a major heel.
Meh. :?
I feel like a major heel.
Meh. :?
Ultimate MJ
Well-Known Member
moonmaster said:
Well, considering I own a car, 2 bikes, and a bus pass, Im not too worried about people going faster than me in cars. If I wanted to go 40 mph, Id do so on my bike, or else just drive. But I like the experience of slowly appreciating the scenery, and sweating to do it. I ride bikes because I like them, not because its my only means of transportation (though i do use it for 90% of my transportation).
In fact, I´ll probably be laughing at YOU... you have no idea what a fun time you are missing out on. You should really try bicycling, its fun, healthy, fast, and did I say fun?
bikes bikes bikes!! :wink:
And I have some major confessionals I could put here to match VVD... but, I think I should wait until Im a more established poster.
For now, I will keep it relevant to the rest of the post and admit that before about 4 years ago, I used to yell at (and occasionally throw trash at) people riding bikes on the road.
Something Im ashamed of now, but I was proud of it then. :cry:
Ultimate Houde
UC's Resident Genetic Recombinator
You want a confessional?
The setup, COllege, where funky things happen. Let me introduce the characters of our story. A young and horny Houde, his petite girl, Ella, and their mutual friend Steph, the tiny redhead.
One day in college, I went over to Ella's dorm, intent on breaking up with her because I had undeniable proof she cheated on me during christmas break (you see, her friends, friend heard it form some in the grocery store who heard it from a factory worker and so on...) I knock on her door, and the door opens, but no one is inside. I come to the conclusion it was left open a crack, a common thing she does, simply because she's in the shower, so I decide to wait. I go in the room, and play with the stapler on her desk.
Houde has a very easy mind to distract. It had small little shiny things on it. Houde was so distracted, he never noticed the door had closed.
Ella stood there, in nothing but her towel. Gone was the intent on breaking up with her, instead, it was replaced by complete and utter horniness. I try to blink it away, and instead force to look at the stapler.
After an awkward conversation about why I was brekaing up with her, I go to leave. As I leave, I hear the sound of a towel hitting the floor, and I look into the mirror.
Her naked glory was in front of me.
Yada yada yada, when I woke up at 3 in the morning, I left a note on her desk, which said "Thanks for the sex, it was great, but I'm still going to break up with you." And I left.
Oh, you think the story was bad enough?
Ella's best friend, and my good friend Steph was in the common room as I was leaving. Asking why I was there, I opted for the truth, well, because I was still high on sex and anything could happen. Steph, instead of hearing that I dumped her after having sex with her, instead led me to her room, where I had sex yet again (Wow 18 years of nothing noe twice in one day! I love this place!).
Yada yada yada, ten o'clock rolled around when I finally left Steph's room. I opened the door, only to see Ella standing there as if she was about to knock. She took one look at me and Steph, and raised her eyebrow.
My exact words.
"Well, I did break up with you."
You see, Houde was a dick in college, and pretty much a laidback ******* now.
I mean, just look at the Anti-Scoop thread
The setup, COllege, where funky things happen. Let me introduce the characters of our story. A young and horny Houde, his petite girl, Ella, and their mutual friend Steph, the tiny redhead.
One day in college, I went over to Ella's dorm, intent on breaking up with her because I had undeniable proof she cheated on me during christmas break (you see, her friends, friend heard it form some in the grocery store who heard it from a factory worker and so on...) I knock on her door, and the door opens, but no one is inside. I come to the conclusion it was left open a crack, a common thing she does, simply because she's in the shower, so I decide to wait. I go in the room, and play with the stapler on her desk.
Houde has a very easy mind to distract. It had small little shiny things on it. Houde was so distracted, he never noticed the door had closed.
Ella stood there, in nothing but her towel. Gone was the intent on breaking up with her, instead, it was replaced by complete and utter horniness. I try to blink it away, and instead force to look at the stapler.
After an awkward conversation about why I was brekaing up with her, I go to leave. As I leave, I hear the sound of a towel hitting the floor, and I look into the mirror.
Her naked glory was in front of me.
Yada yada yada, when I woke up at 3 in the morning, I left a note on her desk, which said "Thanks for the sex, it was great, but I'm still going to break up with you." And I left.
Oh, you think the story was bad enough?
Ella's best friend, and my good friend Steph was in the common room as I was leaving. Asking why I was there, I opted for the truth, well, because I was still high on sex and anything could happen. Steph, instead of hearing that I dumped her after having sex with her, instead led me to her room, where I had sex yet again (Wow 18 years of nothing noe twice in one day! I love this place!).
Yada yada yada, ten o'clock rolled around when I finally left Steph's room. I opened the door, only to see Ella standing there as if she was about to knock. She took one look at me and Steph, and raised her eyebrow.
My exact words.
"Well, I did break up with you."
You see, Houde was a dick in college, and pretty much a laidback ******* now.
I mean, just look at the Anti-Scoop thread
Victor Von Doom
Fist of teh Internets.
Ultimate Houde said:
That's what I'm talking about!!!!!
Have you ever made a girl take "The Walk of Shame"???
I don't know why---but I find it to be absolutely hilarious!!!!! :lol:
What? Like you people expected more from me??? :roll:
moonmaster
Without him, all of you would be lost souls roamin
- Joined
- Feb 23, 2005
- Messages
- 13,670
:lol: :lol: :lol:Baxter said:
Then, as you're laughing at me I'll run you down and back up over you until I hear your head burst like a watermelon.Ultimate MJ said:
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Hahaha!Ultimate Houde said:
Houde's a pimp.
thee great one
Master of TOG-fu.
I've made it a point in my life never be cruel to everyone. I honestly can't think of a horrible thing I ever done to someone. Treat others how you want to be treated. And I believe in karma.
Well I did stab a kid with a knife on a school bus in 8th grade and was arrested.
Well I did stab a kid with a knife on a school bus in 8th grade and was arrested.
Last edited:
Victor Von Doom
Fist of teh Internets.
thee great one said:
Well good for you Earl.
Ultimate MJ
Well-Known Member
moonmaster said:
Funny you should mention that, because a friend of mine just got hit by a car when he was on his bike. He was riding on a busy street (perfectly legal and within his rights, but I would have chosen a quieter sidestreet...) when some dickhead got behind him and started honking and getting real close, even though the passing lane was open.
Well, my buddy slowed down to get single file behind another cyclist friend of mine (to let the jerk pass, something I wouldnt have done) when the jackass hit him, completely destroying the real wheel, chain stand, and seat stand. If you dont know anything about bikes, picture the rear wheel in my avatar and the steel triangle surrounding it crushed. Both of my friends legs could have been broken by another couple of inches of impact. Scary ****. (on a side note, keep your road rage directed at other cars!! a bicyclist is WAY to vulnerable to be a target of your impatience!)
Anyways, getting to the point of the story, my friend realized he was uninjured, but his bike was ****ed... SO..
He gets up, walks onto the kids hood, and kicks his ****ing windshield in! It was in front of the Ogden before a punk show (pretty big venue in denver), and he said the entire line of punks was cheering him. My buddy said hes never seen someones eyes so full of fear. I mean, if I just hit somebody, and they had the balls to get up and kick in my windshield, Id be scared **** -less.
Not something I have the stones to do, but still, pretty damn cool. Of course, it hurts his chances of getting the kids insurance to buy him a new bike, but still... :lol:
edit:
hahahahahahahahahahahaha
As much as I respect the golden rule, that was good.
Last edited:
