Pandrio
Well-Known Member
I think this will describe it quite well.Ultimate Houde said:
Law & Order: UC The Holiday Special
- Thread starter Ultimate Houde
- Start date
thee great one
Master of TOG-fu.
How did I miss this. Great story. I like it that it got serious. Loved Seldes entrance. But why did Houde call them?
Ultimate Houde
UC's Resident Genetic Recombinator
thee great one said:
Cause, Houde is evil in this world, cause thats what happens to Houde in a world without Bass
He's a prick
thee great one
Master of TOG-fu.
Ultimate Houde said:
I always found the real houde to be a prick also.
xCURLYy
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2005
- Messages
- 47
xCURLYy said:
I feel I should apologise for this post, either I was very drunk or my keyboard was very broken..
Ultimate Houde
UC's Resident Genetic Recombinator
xCURLYy said:
I'm merely waiting for whatever it was you promised.
Ultimate Houde
UC's Resident Genetic Recombinator
Bass walked side by side with Seldes in silence, and eventually, their destination came into view. It was an old house, an orphange.
Bass: This was my old orphange.
Seldes: Yes, you and your brother grew up in here, correct?
Bass: Yay, then I left cause I got adopted without him.
Seldes: In this world, he never had your influence, and instead of becoming a bumbling villian, he became a full fledged villian.
Bass: But he killed that guy.
Seldes: He didn't TGO did. He may have ordered it, but what do you expect, he's a bad guy you know.
Bass: I want to go home.
Seldes: As long as you realize what I'm trying to show you
Bass: That I'm important in the scheme of things.
Seldes: Yup, now, you live life to the fullest, even if it means to help your friend throw a Christmas party, no matter how dorky it is.
Bass: Okay, so , how do I get back.
Seldes: Men, always rushing things.
She touched Bass on the chest.
Bass: Ow.
He feels another thump
Bass: That hurt.
Then everything went black.
~~~
Bass opened his blurry eyes to see the face of Curly bending down to give him a kiss.
Bass: AH!
Bass pushes Curly away from him.
Bass: What the hell are you trying to do.
Curly: Hey boss, he's moving again.
Bass: Boss?
Bass looks over to see Seldes wearing a EMT uniform. He realizes Curly is wearing the same type.
Bass: Seldes?
Seldes: Sir, are you okay? You slipped on that nasty piece of ice right there.
Bass: Slipped on ice?
Seldes: Yea, you knocked yourself out. My partner over here has the tendency to deliver CPR even when people don't need it.
Curly: It woke him up, didn't it.
Bass: Can I go?
Seldes: 'Friad not, the Ambulance is coming, we need to make sure you don't have any concussions.
Bass: I need to! I HAVE TO SAVE CHRISTMAS!
Bass realized the rest of the people on the street kinda gave him a weirdo look.
Seldes: I'm sorry sir, but Christmas is going to have to wait.
Bass: IT CAN'T WAIT!
Seldes: It's not for another few days though sir, surely you can wait a couple of hours.
Bass: I CAN'T!
He jumps to his feet, knocks Curly down, even though Curly wasn't making a move to stop him, and runs off cackling.
Bass: I'M COMING HOUDE!
~~~
DIrishB's Bungalow
Nur and MWoF called upon DIrishB and Doc Comic.
Doc Comic: Wow, you guys got me a cool looking trenchcoat, thanks!
Nur (whispering): That's my trenchcoat
MWoF (whispering): I know man, but I felt bad, we didn't get him anything.
Doc Comic: This is awesome!
MWoF: And he's so happy right now.
Nur: And for our favorite Drunk Irish Bastard, we got...
Nur's phone rang.
Nur: Hold on, it's Bass, Hello?
Bass: Nur, get to the police station
Nur: Why?
Bass: Christmas party
Nur: We are hanging out at DIrishB's right now man.
Bass: And how's that suasage fest going.
Nur: Point, can we bring the green stuff?
Bass: Yes, now get down there.
Nur hangs up the phone.
Nur: Guys, bring the weed, it's party time at the police station.
Doc Comic: YAY!
DIrishB: I still want my gift....
MWoF: I hope Bass brings booze.
~~~
Bass hung up the phone, and was about to call OurChair's, when he saw the Asian man standing outside a club with Compound.
Bass: What's up guys?
OurChair: We can't get into the club.
Bass: Why?
Compound: Me no likely rures
Bass: What?
OurChair: He says they wouldn't let us in, because we were too short, we didn't pass the height test.
Bass looks over and sees the white line on the door.
Bass: Hold on.
He walks over to the bouncer who goes to keep him back.
Bass: May I interest you in some Christmas spirit?
The bouncer looks at Bass oddly.
Bass punches him in the face, and the bouncer drops.
Bass: Be right back.
Compound: He's my hero.
OurChair: Wow...
Bass comes walking back out,m followed by a stream of ladies.
Bass: And these are my friends, OurChair and Compound, they're going to show you where the party's at.
Random females: THey are so CUTE!
Compound: Would you like recipe for cream os sum young gai soup?
Random Females: And they can cook too.
OurChair: Let's go, to the 82nd Precinct!
Bass picked up his phone once more.
~~~
Ice: Hey Nig, it's Ice, I was wondering what your doing right now, I'm waiting for you to call me back....
Nigma deleted the message, and sighed theatrically.
Nigma: He is so weird.
The phone rang again, and Nigma picked up the phone.
Nigma: Listen you flipping twit, I'm not your fri...
Bass: Nigma, it's Bass
Nigma: Oh sorry, what's up?
Bass: Call Ice, and get your *** over to the precicnt.
Nigma: Do I have to
Bass: Yes, and dammit, be friends to him
Nigma: Why?
Bass: Cause if your not, I'll be showing you some of my special Christmas spirit.
Nigma: Okay, okay!
~~~
Bass arrived at his last destination, and his hardest to convince. He got everyone else to agree they were coming, and now he needed to get the final piece.
E.
He walked over to the door, and knocked on it.
Child: Coming!
Bass raised an eyebrow, he knew E had kids and all, but he's never seen them other than photos on a desk. A small girl opens the door.
Girl: Hello, are you Ice-T?
Bass: Common mistake, but no, it your Dad home?
Girl: Yea, hold a sec.
She shut the door.
A few minutes later E opens it.
E: What's this about?
Bass: Come to the party
E: No
Bass: Why not?
From the background, A woman walks out, holding E's baby and little girl, smiles as she passes Bass, and leads the children out.
Bass' other eyebrow raises.
Bass: Oh, so you and wife give teh kids to the sister, and your going to have relantions.
E: Yes, now go.
Bass: Nope, not until I can convince you to come.
E: And how do you plan to do that?
A few minutes later E wholeheartedly agreed, taking the package from Bass, and shutting the door.
Bass ran for the station.
~~~
Houde sat on the empty steps to the empty station.
Houde: Merry Christmas, to me....
He blew on a squaker forlonly.
Houde: Merry Christmas to me....
He then heard a commotion from down the street. Cars began pulling up, and people began walking to the street.
Houde: Nur? MWoF? DIrishB? Doc?
MWoF: We're here to party man!
Nur: Get the greens out!
DIrishB: They brought me my own hooker!
And sure enough, a hot flossy babe on his arm.
Babe: I'm from Amsterdam ya.
Houde: Nice
Doc Comic: And they got me a trenchcoat!
Houde: Isn't that your trenchcoat?
Nur: Shush
Behind Nur was OurChair, Compound, and the gaggle of club dressed girls.
Houde: HOLY TATAS!
OurChair: Holy tatas indeed!
Compound's grin was threatening to overtake his face
Houde: What happened?
OurChair: Some Christmas spirit, say hello to Houde ladies, he's defeated bad guys.
Random Females: Aw, he's so cute!
Behind them came Nigma and Ice.
Ice: I'm so glad you called me.
Nigma: Yea, just, you know, stop acting so dorky around me alright.
Ice: Hey, check out th ebutt on that girl
Nigma: Your straight?
Houde grinned, allowing people in. Finally, A car drove up really fast, and skidded to a stop in front of the station.
Houde: E?
E stepped out wearing a Santa outfit. His wife stepped out, wearing a Mrs. Claus outfit, that was very nice looking.
E: MERRY CHRISTMAS! WHERE'S MY ELVES!
Hawkeye101 and Orson Scott Card stepped out of the back of the car in elf outfits.
Hawkeye101: PRESENT TIME!
OSC: YAY!
They ran inside, Houde followed.
The party was in fullswing, a culminous cloud of smoke was eminating around DIrishB, and the ladies that came with OurChair and Compound where dancing with everyone, and everyone was smilingly. Bass walked up behind Houde, and clapped him on the shoulder.
Houde: You came, I'm surprised.
Bass: I had a change of heart.
Houde felt a prescene of someone else on his other side. Turning around, Skotti planted a kiss on him.
Skotti: Standing under a mistletoe.
He looks up to see Bass' hand holding a mistletoe above his head.
Houde: I love Christmas.
E was throwing gifts left and right, yelling.
E: HO HO HO!
Houde: How did you get him to come?
Bass: I told him that him and his wife could keep the costumes.
A lull in music caused Houde to shout.
Houde: GOD BLESS AS EVERYONE!
Bass gives him a look.
Bass: Sometimes you remind me how dorky you are.
Houde: It felt right
Skotti: Dork
She waltzed into the party.
Houde: I love christmas.
Bass: I do too man, I do too.
~~~
Two figures watched the party from outside.
Curly: So, I get some damn wings now?
Seldes: I didn't hear a bell.
Nearby a church bell rang.
Curly: So, that's a bell
Seldes: I didn't hear it
Curly: COME ON! IT'S RINGING A WHOLE HELL OF ALOT!
Seldes: I don't hear it
They both walked down the street as the snow picked up, and obscured them from sight.
Bass: This was my old orphange.
Seldes: Yes, you and your brother grew up in here, correct?
Bass: Yay, then I left cause I got adopted without him.
Seldes: In this world, he never had your influence, and instead of becoming a bumbling villian, he became a full fledged villian.
Bass: But he killed that guy.
Seldes: He didn't TGO did. He may have ordered it, but what do you expect, he's a bad guy you know.
Bass: I want to go home.
Seldes: As long as you realize what I'm trying to show you
Bass: That I'm important in the scheme of things.
Seldes: Yup, now, you live life to the fullest, even if it means to help your friend throw a Christmas party, no matter how dorky it is.
Bass: Okay, so , how do I get back.
Seldes: Men, always rushing things.
She touched Bass on the chest.
Bass: Ow.
He feels another thump
Bass: That hurt.
Then everything went black.
~~~
Bass opened his blurry eyes to see the face of Curly bending down to give him a kiss.
Bass: AH!
Bass pushes Curly away from him.
Bass: What the hell are you trying to do.
Curly: Hey boss, he's moving again.
Bass: Boss?
Bass looks over to see Seldes wearing a EMT uniform. He realizes Curly is wearing the same type.
Bass: Seldes?
Seldes: Sir, are you okay? You slipped on that nasty piece of ice right there.
Bass: Slipped on ice?
Seldes: Yea, you knocked yourself out. My partner over here has the tendency to deliver CPR even when people don't need it.
Curly: It woke him up, didn't it.
Bass: Can I go?
Seldes: 'Friad not, the Ambulance is coming, we need to make sure you don't have any concussions.
Bass: I need to! I HAVE TO SAVE CHRISTMAS!
Bass realized the rest of the people on the street kinda gave him a weirdo look.
Seldes: I'm sorry sir, but Christmas is going to have to wait.
Bass: IT CAN'T WAIT!
Seldes: It's not for another few days though sir, surely you can wait a couple of hours.
Bass: I CAN'T!
He jumps to his feet, knocks Curly down, even though Curly wasn't making a move to stop him, and runs off cackling.
Bass: I'M COMING HOUDE!
~~~
DIrishB's Bungalow
Nur and MWoF called upon DIrishB and Doc Comic.
Doc Comic: Wow, you guys got me a cool looking trenchcoat, thanks!
Nur (whispering): That's my trenchcoat
MWoF (whispering): I know man, but I felt bad, we didn't get him anything.
Doc Comic: This is awesome!
MWoF: And he's so happy right now.
Nur: And for our favorite Drunk Irish Bastard, we got...
Nur's phone rang.
Nur: Hold on, it's Bass, Hello?
Bass: Nur, get to the police station
Nur: Why?
Bass: Christmas party
Nur: We are hanging out at DIrishB's right now man.
Bass: And how's that suasage fest going.
Nur: Point, can we bring the green stuff?
Bass: Yes, now get down there.
Nur hangs up the phone.
Nur: Guys, bring the weed, it's party time at the police station.
Doc Comic: YAY!
DIrishB: I still want my gift....
MWoF: I hope Bass brings booze.
~~~
Bass hung up the phone, and was about to call OurChair's, when he saw the Asian man standing outside a club with Compound.
Bass: What's up guys?
OurChair: We can't get into the club.
Bass: Why?
Compound: Me no likely rures
Bass: What?
OurChair: He says they wouldn't let us in, because we were too short, we didn't pass the height test.
Bass looks over and sees the white line on the door.
Bass: Hold on.
He walks over to the bouncer who goes to keep him back.
Bass: May I interest you in some Christmas spirit?
The bouncer looks at Bass oddly.
Bass punches him in the face, and the bouncer drops.
Bass: Be right back.
Compound: He's my hero.
OurChair: Wow...
Bass comes walking back out,m followed by a stream of ladies.
Bass: And these are my friends, OurChair and Compound, they're going to show you where the party's at.
Random females: THey are so CUTE!
Compound: Would you like recipe for cream os sum young gai soup?
Random Females: And they can cook too.
OurChair: Let's go, to the 82nd Precinct!
Bass picked up his phone once more.
~~~
Ice: Hey Nig, it's Ice, I was wondering what your doing right now, I'm waiting for you to call me back....
Nigma deleted the message, and sighed theatrically.
Nigma: He is so weird.
The phone rang again, and Nigma picked up the phone.
Nigma: Listen you flipping twit, I'm not your fri...
Bass: Nigma, it's Bass
Nigma: Oh sorry, what's up?
Bass: Call Ice, and get your *** over to the precicnt.
Nigma: Do I have to
Bass: Yes, and dammit, be friends to him
Nigma: Why?
Bass: Cause if your not, I'll be showing you some of my special Christmas spirit.
Nigma: Okay, okay!
~~~
Bass arrived at his last destination, and his hardest to convince. He got everyone else to agree they were coming, and now he needed to get the final piece.
E.
He walked over to the door, and knocked on it.
Child: Coming!
Bass raised an eyebrow, he knew E had kids and all, but he's never seen them other than photos on a desk. A small girl opens the door.
Girl: Hello, are you Ice-T?
Bass: Common mistake, but no, it your Dad home?
Girl: Yea, hold a sec.
She shut the door.
A few minutes later E opens it.
E: What's this about?
Bass: Come to the party
E: No
Bass: Why not?
From the background, A woman walks out, holding E's baby and little girl, smiles as she passes Bass, and leads the children out.
Bass' other eyebrow raises.
Bass: Oh, so you and wife give teh kids to the sister, and your going to have relantions.
E: Yes, now go.
Bass: Nope, not until I can convince you to come.
E: And how do you plan to do that?
A few minutes later E wholeheartedly agreed, taking the package from Bass, and shutting the door.
Bass ran for the station.
~~~
Houde sat on the empty steps to the empty station.
Houde: Merry Christmas, to me....
He blew on a squaker forlonly.
Houde: Merry Christmas to me....
He then heard a commotion from down the street. Cars began pulling up, and people began walking to the street.
Houde: Nur? MWoF? DIrishB? Doc?
MWoF: We're here to party man!
Nur: Get the greens out!
DIrishB: They brought me my own hooker!
And sure enough, a hot flossy babe on his arm.
Babe: I'm from Amsterdam ya.
Houde: Nice
Doc Comic: And they got me a trenchcoat!
Houde: Isn't that your trenchcoat?
Nur: Shush
Behind Nur was OurChair, Compound, and the gaggle of club dressed girls.
Houde: HOLY TATAS!
OurChair: Holy tatas indeed!
Compound's grin was threatening to overtake his face
Houde: What happened?
OurChair: Some Christmas spirit, say hello to Houde ladies, he's defeated bad guys.
Random Females: Aw, he's so cute!
Behind them came Nigma and Ice.
Ice: I'm so glad you called me.
Nigma: Yea, just, you know, stop acting so dorky around me alright.
Ice: Hey, check out th ebutt on that girl
Nigma: Your straight?
Houde grinned, allowing people in. Finally, A car drove up really fast, and skidded to a stop in front of the station.
Houde: E?
E stepped out wearing a Santa outfit. His wife stepped out, wearing a Mrs. Claus outfit, that was very nice looking.
E: MERRY CHRISTMAS! WHERE'S MY ELVES!
Hawkeye101 and Orson Scott Card stepped out of the back of the car in elf outfits.
Hawkeye101: PRESENT TIME!
OSC: YAY!
They ran inside, Houde followed.
The party was in fullswing, a culminous cloud of smoke was eminating around DIrishB, and the ladies that came with OurChair and Compound where dancing with everyone, and everyone was smilingly. Bass walked up behind Houde, and clapped him on the shoulder.
Houde: You came, I'm surprised.
Bass: I had a change of heart.
Houde felt a prescene of someone else on his other side. Turning around, Skotti planted a kiss on him.
Skotti: Standing under a mistletoe.
He looks up to see Bass' hand holding a mistletoe above his head.
Houde: I love Christmas.
E was throwing gifts left and right, yelling.
E: HO HO HO!
Houde: How did you get him to come?
Bass: I told him that him and his wife could keep the costumes.
A lull in music caused Houde to shout.
Houde: GOD BLESS AS EVERYONE!
Bass gives him a look.
Bass: Sometimes you remind me how dorky you are.
Houde: It felt right
Skotti: Dork
She waltzed into the party.
Houde: I love christmas.
Bass: I do too man, I do too.
~~~
Two figures watched the party from outside.
Curly: So, I get some damn wings now?
Seldes: I didn't hear a bell.
Nearby a church bell rang.
Curly: So, that's a bell
Seldes: I didn't hear it
Curly: COME ON! IT'S RINGING A WHOLE HELL OF ALOT!
Seldes: I don't hear it
They both walked down the street as the snow picked up, and obscured them from sight.
Merry Christmas!
Last edited:
Bass
Nexus of the World
Ultimate Houde said:
I swear to God, Curly would say this.
Well Houde, that was terrific and heart-warming. Especially the special secret Christmas spirit of punching. Truly, you are a King among men. :cry: It was so beautiful. :cry: :cry:
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Last edited:
Random
Didn't **** any of those *****es
Ultimate Houde said:
These parts had me rolling
Doc Comic
Well-Known Member
And thus, the origin of Doc's trench coat is explained.
thee great one
Master of TOG-fu.
GENIUS!
Seldes Katne
Site mom
I thought this was a very touching tribute to both the Christmas spirit and your fellow members of Ultimate Central. You seem to have a knack for fictionalizing our "real-life" members in a way that is funny, but affectionate as well. A charming story, despite being written on a very tight deadline.
If you don't mind, I'm going to print out a copy for my Ultimate Marvel Fanfiction scrapbook at home. Also, you might want to "collect" this and the rest of the series onto a "trade thread" that we could keep permanently onsite, if you haven't started doing that already.
(Oh, and thank you for writing my character so that my dignity remains (more or less) intact. :wink: PM me a mailing address, please -- I think I owe you a bookmark or two....)
If you don't mind, I'm going to print out a copy for my Ultimate Marvel Fanfiction scrapbook at home. Also, you might want to "collect" this and the rest of the series onto a "trade thread" that we could keep permanently onsite, if you haven't started doing that already.
(Oh, and thank you for writing my character so that my dignity remains (more or less) intact. :wink: PM me a mailing address, please -- I think I owe you a bookmark or two....)
Ultimate Houde
UC's Resident Genetic Recombinator
The thread is all collected in the Marathon Law and Order found in my sig
I simply have yet to update this section.
Thanks for the praise!
(Edited, the Holiday Special has been added to the Marathon)
I simply have yet to update this section.
Thanks for the praise!
(Edited, the Holiday Special has been added to the Marathon)
Last edited:
Ultimate Quicksilver
Well-Known Member
That was so cool :cry: I loved it :heart:
Pandrio
Well-Known Member
:lol:
Ultimate Houde
UC's Resident Genetic Recombinator
Pandrio said:
Oh crap, I meant to add you in as part of the band.
Oh well
You were part of the band playing in the background.
Pandrio
Well-Known Member
On my broken keyboard?Ultimate Houde said:
Ultimate Houde
UC's Resident Genetic Recombinator
Pandrio said:
This is the real reality, your keyboard is fine
