Once again, lemee 'splain. ... No, there is too much. Lemee sum up.
Buttercup and Humperdink... no wait. That was the Princess Bride. What a great film.
As for The Ultimates 2: Grand Theft America...
A traitor has been working behind the scenes - exposing the Hulk as Banner and talking to Giant Man (who has been fired). That is all. The horror. Loki, who is working with the traitor has had Thor arrested and depowered. Then the traitor kills all of Hawkeye's family and then shoots him in the head - not to kill him, but to capture him. SHIELD examine the scene and discover Captain America was the traitor (which makes sense) and beats him up and arrest him. Then, out of nowhere, a giant armada of 50-foot tall robots and a swarm of flying superhumans wearing suits that make them superhuman but kill them after a month attack and conquer America (presumably, only for a month), calling themselves the Liberators because Masters of Evil is too corny. Black Widow turns out to be the traitor because she's a Russian spy and that's what they do all the time because they're Russian spies (which doesn't make much sense). Iron Man then beats her up easily because he can. Then flies into space and hooks up to a Death Star and kills the 50-foot tall robots whilst drunk. Hawkeye is imprisoned and about to be killed, but then breaks out using his fingernails, which he could've done at any time prior to giving away all the security codes to the enemy that allowed them to attack America. He then escapes and immediately joins the "big fight" on the White House lawn because the villains decided to hide him in the one place no one would expect - the White House. Captain America is also arrested and about to be beaten up by the Schizoid Man. But Wasp frees him in a few seconds and then they fight Schizoid Man to the win. Out of nowhere, the wandering Bruce Banner arrives on the scene (because he's worried that he's an uncontrollable danger to society and fugitive, he went to the White House) and turns into the Hulk, but the Hulk is now smart...er and can talk and showboat. Nick Fury has an arm punched off, but no other Ultimate title has ever referenced this ever. Perun steals Thor's hammer - and then everyone forgets this and he's never seen again. He just disappears. Giant Man is working for the Liberators, realises that they're going to lose because the Liberators have rounded up the Fantastic Four and the X-Men and every other superhero in Manhattan and shipped them to the White House so they can all be in one place to stage a break out. Giant Man pretends he was infiltrating the Liberators. No one believes him. No one cares Black Widow was the traitor (like the readers). The Union show up dressed as Clark Kent and presumably beat everyone up. Despite being in several different countries, they all get to America during a military invasion and into the White House lawn without being noticed - because they're wearing glasses. Wasp becomes giant-sized because being small and beaten up by the Schizoid Man was part of her plan. Not only that, she instantly gains giant-powers even though everyone else needed a medical facility within the Triskelion to do so. And her clothes grow with her. Even though they've never shrunk when she has, and they've never grown with any of the Goliaths or Giant-Men in the series to date. But it just happens and no one comments. Quicksilver faces off against Hurricane and beats her because he's just faster than her. Hulk faces Abomination, a stronger, smarter, Hulk, but Hulk beats him 'just because'. Captain America faces of against the Colonel (not Red Skull because it's corny). They have a lightsaber fight. Hulk then cuts off Red Skull's hands with Cap's shield. Cap then kills a cripple. We don't get how this ties to the metaphor of an Islamic Red Skull being bad. Then Loki reveals himself as the 'giant bad guy' because he's upset all his insidious warmongering has resulted in a war. To stop said war he's been orchestrating for a year, he reveals he's the bad guy behind it all so everyone has someone to unite against, thus unifying man and creating order - the antithesis of his desire to be a god of chaos. Then Scarlet Witch deus ex machinas Thor out of nowhere, with his hammer (Perun is completely forgotten) so he can fight Loki in a no-holds barred TLC match for the World Wrestling Federation heavyweight championship belt wrapped up in the US flag.
